The Club Experience

Tonight was the worst night to plan a "balada." Take 40 strung-out college students who are in Brazil for their first time and tell them an outing to a club has been planned, and that they should only drink 1 caipirinha because even if you can hold your tequila you can't hold your caipirinha and there is a language placement test at 8 in the morning.  Is that a challenge? Who thought this was a good idea?

Who isn't going to go?

Nobody wanted to go. But of course, how could we not? The pressure was never spoken and overwhelmingly felt.

People are funny. We are so easily herded! Especially in this sort of situation. I pass no judgment--I meshed with the flock just as seamlessly as the next guy. There was a moment when I decided I wasn't going to go. But then, out of nowhere, I got this sudden surge of energy. And all I wanted to do was get to this fucking club! 

I have never been to a club before. Bars, yes. You know I love to dance, but I am not a club-frequenter, per se.  I had this notion of a club, especially a Brazilian one.


Packed. Bass bumping. Lights flashing. Bodies sweating, swaying. A thick smell of booze and human. 

Yeah. Not this one. 


Maybe Wednesday at 10:30 is not the peak club time. TAPAS CLUB was filled with American exchange students tonight, and that is about it.  

I tend to wax dramatic, pardon. It wasn't bad--it was good! The bass was there. I had a good "first club experience."Everyone was awkward, and I was thinking "Shit. I'm here. Might as well dance." So I danced for a minute, but the vibe wasn't really poppin' out. 


The reason why I suddenly got that surge to go that I spoke of earlier, though I could not have known it at the time: I met a guy on the way to this club. A guy who is down. An American, a part of the program. He sort of gravitated towards me. And we got to talkin. Talkin talkin talkin. Music--like I say, he is down, especially here. Women. My man shares my deep love for a (different) woman very far away from here. People, life. Drugs, alcohol. The relation is there folks. 

We beat it outta there pretty fast. But now I know why I went. 


There will be more clubs. Might get the "quintessential club experience." Clubs clubs clubs. Tonight, I met my new friend Alex. E agora, eu estou satisfeto demais. 


I love Brazil. Sao Paulo is a big city. New York? No. It sure ain't like home. 


I am poised--walking through each moment seeking to seek nothing. Feeling the connection to home. Missing the people I love so. In loving myself, I am connecting to Brazil. And vice versa. 


Expectations are damaging. And not as fun.

-Nicloau 

(my roommate has not yet returned from his club experience. I am in the dark. More details on the not-so-shenanigans of the evening mais tarde)